What the Man Says....

Well my boss initially seemed quite keen on finding a way to keep me on board. Then this morning the VP of Marketing came by to suggest a resource for people navigating career changes. This was predicated on the belief that I would need to change careers to find a position in VT as presumably I will need a new job. This seems to be a strong indication that decisions at the executive suite aren't going as I might have hoped.

C'est la vies.

On a completely different note, I had a horrendous run in with a sort-of friend this weekend. The sort-of friend is someody that I was really good friends with when we first met but that that initial pop of friendship has waned over the years into a lingering relationship that exists primarily as a nod to the fact that she was very supportive when I went through a painful breakup 2 years ago. It is a strange phenomenon that has kept us together this long. A relationship driven primarily by guilt and a sense of obligation.

She was the friend that was nutty but you sort-of overlooked the nuttiness of this sort-of friend trying to chalk it up to being quirky instead of raw insanity. Well she unleashed her raw insanity on me Friday night and it was U-G-L-Y. It was one of those scenes I wouldn't have believed could actually happen outside of the Jerry Springer studio. Something so out of hand that I can't find the words to describe it other than to say I hope to never witness anything like it ever again.

On the upside, I won't have to maintain the sort-of friendship any longer. Which after all this time, comes as more of a relief than I would have expected.

Good News!

Well despite my alarming stress-induced boil and loud misgivings, I managed to spill the beans to the boss this morning.

I was surprised and hopeful by his response. It was simply this, "What do you want?" Well I want to keep my job, salary, benefits, move to VT and continue to work here but have absolutely no expectation of that being a reasonable request. So I asked, "What do YOU want?"

"I want you to stay on the project."

OK its not a guarantee but its about 1,000% more positive than the response I had been prepared for. I didn't even think that full time remote employment was even within the realm of possibility. So now I'm all giddy and excited. Maybe I won't end up managing an Olive Garden after all.

Tomorrow 10:00 AM PST

Tomorrow I have a meeting with my boss. I actually like him. He leaves me alone, helps when I ask for it, and is generally supportive. All of these things are rare.

Tomorrow I'm supposed to tell him that Jan 2 is my last day. There has been much debate among my friends as to if this is too much notice. But I'm leaving him in a bad spot and I wouldn't feel right about waiting much longer. Also I won't know if I'll be allowed to work remotely until I come clean about my plan to flee the scene. And plus, sneaky just isn't my thing.

So I've been waiting for this day for MONTHS. And yet as the clock winds down to our meeting, I'm feeling increasingly unsettled about it. I have butterflies. I'm distracted. And the little pimple on my cheek has expanded to a full boil. At this rate I fear its simply pausing on the path to growing into a fully formed second head. And there is a little voice inside my head (or maybe it is the growing consciousness of what will soon be my second head) saying, "Wait."

Unfortunately I can't tell if this is a wise voice that I should listen to or simply the voice of fear of the unknown.

The longer I wait, the less I look like a team player. The less I look like a team player, the less likely he is to go to bat for me to work remotely.

The longer I wait the more painful it will be for him when I give notice, the more negotiating leverage I have.

The sooner I give notice the sooner I can stop feeling guilty about not giving notice.

The sooner I give notice the sooner I can "work from home" to actually spend some time in VT with Frenchie.

The sooner I give notice the sooner I can find out if I need to find a new job in VT or will be able to keep my own.

Thoughts? Hmmm....